waiting

so vacation was last week and i really needed it, but i should have used my time better!

i really like lists b/c they kind of organize my thoughts :)

1) TC: i loved getting to see people again, but i never feel like i get to hang out/heart-to-hearts with all the people i want to! serving on shep team was nice--it's so encouraging to see people wanting to meet with God. i wasn't quite "there" spiritually and had a bad attitude at some points and i reallyy regret that. it's like i didn't truly want God to speak to me. at prayse fire, i saw how broken we all really are. i also realized how i am really scared of being vulnerable/letting people see my weaknesses. in retrospect, i know i need to conquer my giants of gossip, inconsistency, and dishonesty. i also need to learn to seek God's face.

2) break: besides being a bum at home, i went to the movies, visited the revolving museum, and went to wrentham and natick. i also ate out too much tgif's, brew'd, bertucci's, outback, minado, and panera! it was nice hanging out w/ lyfers and tc kids :)

3) movies: i watched "he's just not that into you" (cute chickflick), "definitely, maybe" (super cute chickflick), and "fight club" (mm...too violent, but interesante plot!)

4)aim: so after sleeping at 3 and 5 am b/c of chatting on aim, i remember why i don't use it. haha i guess i have more control w/ gchat b/c less people use it?

5) video messaging: yeah...quite an influx of it on my part. i have to admit video messaging is fun/it's like your w/ the person, but not really. however, i apologize for pretty much being excessively on newsfeeds.

5) otra: so this week i definitely slacked with spending time w/ God, doing school/scholarship stuff, reading my magazines (time and reader's digest), cleaning, replying to messages promptly, and sleep. however, i did do taebo on friday :)

6) phones: water spilled in my bag, breaking my phone at tc. haha this is only the fourth time this has happened. verizon is being super kind and giving me another one even though i'm pretty sure my phone is off warranty. i have the phone and am waiting for the battery, but i kind of like not having a phone. i don't constantly look for texts and i guess i'm slowly reaching my amish ideal haha.

7) lent: i definitely need to "get back where it all began/when i would long for only You" (starfield :) i'm not sure what i'll give up, but i want to try my best to commit to spending an hour with God each morning. i'm thinking of giving up media (except the news)...part of me knows this is the best, but another part of me is like "i should maintain my relationships from tc" (even though not all those relationships are exactly uplifting.

8) back on track?: today was really good--i had enough sleep (i ended up falling asleep on a table after tutoring though haha), was responsive in euro, read 2 time's, did tae bo/ate healthily, spent real time with God(it was really refreshing--i don't know why i always forget that), truly prayed, cleaned a bit, replied to messages, and kind of applied for an internship! i hope this discipline lasts and i really should do homework!

9) tutoring: this activity will be dominating my life. haha i have to tutor mondays, tuesdays, thursdays, and fridays. i used to just tutor twice a week for school, but haha i kinda need 20 hrs of community service for NHS by april 1 so i'm tutoring for my middle school. then last week, my friend told me that the librarian's daughter needs math tutoring (yay for kumon experience...not really)

10) summer: so i planned to find a paid internship in boston and hang out with people before college all summer, but i don't know if that's going to happen b/c i don't know if my sister's connection will work out. haha my other option is to spend my whole summer in shanghai w/ my sister steph and learn chinese. i really want to do both, but ideally i'd want to do option a this summer and option b next.